A List of Things To Love About Yourself

Shifting perspective is a helpful tool when it comes to setting a healthy mindset. One way to work on shifting your perspective is by cognitive reframing. Cognitive reframing consists of identifying negative thoughts and changing the way you look at those thoughts in order to gain new perspective. Cognitive reframing can be a helpful tool by identifying a pattern of thinking that you feel is holding you back from a specific task and then changing the wording of the thought.

One way to practice how to reframe thoughts is by creating a list of things you love about yourself. This list can help learn how to reframe your thoughts by replacing negative thoughts you might have with more positive, self-love thoughts. This activity is “living, breathing and growing.” The list is not a stagnant thing, but rather can be adjusted and added to as time moves forward. The idea of this list is to have something tangible in your back pocket to pull out any time when you are struggling with insecurities, and can set a shift of perspective in motion. While creating this list, you might recognize that this is the first time (or first time in a long time) that you have spent time focusing on yourself in a positive way. The goal is to help start to shift your perspective so that the time you do spend thinking about yourself can be loving and kind instead of harsh or judgmental. Most times, when we catch ourselves talking out situations in our head, it has a negative undertone. This list is a way to start actively reframing those thoughts by recognizing the positive attributes we have so that we can learn to value them.

Starting this activity can be easy and accessible; start by making a list in your phone. Title it whatever feels right to you and know that this list is there for you to reference anytime. Try to avoid sitting down and randomly thinking of things. The activity works best when you live your life authentically and step back in moments when you recognize something that makes you think “oh wow, I like that thing about me.” It could be after making a friend laugh and realizing you are funny, or being with a loved one as they face a challenge and realizing you are empathetic. This activity requires more attention to the minute details of your daily life and recognizing the attributes that you may not have noticed prior.  Sometimes, these things will be reflected through others, and other times, they will be things you notice on your own. 

While practicing this activity, it can be helpful to remember the quote “internal happiness exudes external happiness.” In this exercise, you are working on developing the sense of internal happiness and appreciation for yourself and your qualities. As you continue to add to the list, it can become a truly special place that you can visit. Here are three simple steps to establish your list of things you love about yourself:

Step 1:

Find a place for the list. It can be a note in your phone, in a physical journal, or a document on your computer. I like this list to be in my phone so I can add to it from anywhere and access it on the go!

Step 2:

Live your life and let the things you love about yourself come to you. Be aware that you are working toward finding these things and pointing them out, especially through paying attention to the little things. If you are struggling with this part, it can be helpful to ask a trusted friend or family member what they love about you, and put those items on the list if you agree.

Step 3:

Continue to explore this list and visit it often. This list can serve many purposes, such as simply bringing you joy in times that feel stable, while also helping you cope and reframe your thoughts in challenging times. Making the list can be fun and rewarding, and revisiting it later can be affirming in times of self-doubt.

This list is designed to be a fun way to spark your creativity and love for yourself! Through shifting your mindset and practicing cognitive reframing, you can find some freedom from the negative thought patterns that might be holding you back! Have fun with it.  

If you are interested in learning more about reframing negative thoughts, self-esteem building and confidence, or need any additional support in building this loving relationship with yourself please reach out to Lily@upsidertherapy.com to learn more.